I mean, could it just be coincidence that on this most auspicious, if innocuous, of days - i.e. The First Day of the Rest of This Film's Life - that I would receive a package postmarked Beverly Hills? Containing what looks like an authentic (and expensive!) item of Dolly Parton memorabilia? And a formal note (on thick stock) claiming the gift is from a leading Hollywood actor who's learned of my project "through the grapevine" and would very much like to read the script - but for "business reasons" wishes to remain "under the radar" for the time being...??!
I am standing here, alternating between "flabbergasted" and "a little creeped out". I don't quite know what to make of this. Is it a hoax? If so, what would possibly be the point? And why send me what looks like a fairly rare and price-y gift if you're such a hot shot actor? Isn't it supposed to work the other way around? Aren't I supposed to woo YOU?
Then again, if it's not a hoax, who IS this person and what do they really want? And why? What have they heard about the project? And from who? Whom?
I have looked - believe me - I have scoured the package and its contents for any clues as to where and who this came from. There's nothing. It came in a generic brown cardboard box wrapped in brown butcher's paper on which a computer label is stuck right in the middle bearing my name and address. Nothing else. There's no return address anywhere - just a Beverly Hills postmark beside the pre-paid postage in the upper right hand corner.
Inside, the "gift" in question was carefully wrapped in white tissue paper and protected by those foam peanut things. The note is laser-printed on thick, creamy paper in a matching - but very blank - envelope.
All I have to go on is a gmail address - to which I am being requested to send the script - as well as this person's assurances that my project is of great interest to people who are in a position to help me get it made.
Will? Is that you?